30 September

last month of the day... working today.. kind of tired.. had my lunch at 7pm.. lolz.. thank to those 2.. come down spot check.. thank lor... leg aching from yesterday training... tomorrow still got to go for long run... maybe a 15km or more ba... need to start training for dec race...

during work, saw a lot of couple walking pass... hai... start to think about why my life is so different from the rest... why can't i rest well during holiday like sleep late, go out with friends, training and finish those drama that i want to watch... at time my friends call me out but i can't due to my work.. i don't want to work but no choice i have to... working and studying together is so stress... even when school start, i still have to work on weekend... sometime i really can feel so stress! wanted to find someone to talk to but no one... most of my friends isn't that sort that will listen... i thought you will be the one but now... i really don't know if u still can be like last time.. talk to me, msg me and keep me acc by that... for the time being i shall wait...

my life have once again change..

28 September

hoping to get another chance from u.. things might be different now but i really hope to get another chance..

28 September

have been thinking a lot since friday... have i really change? i don't know... maybe i being too friendly toward gals... got to change... should be happy that at least she pointed out some bad point about me.. at least she care but will that be too late? will i be given another chance??? i might not have do things to make u special but i did do some small small stuff that no one know... not even u... standing at ur pint of view, i understand how u feel and i know i really nv do much... do understand that i've been through failue... i really very scare to be falling alone... i know u have someone to tok to and get some advise from, do understand.. i'm all alone... no one to tok to... or should i say.. i suffering alone sliently i don't want to many people to know.. i scare they will make fun of u... but i don't mind as long as u understand.. i'm willing to give in more.. much much more...

will u give me another chance?

26 September

today training shiok sia... 3km warm up run, 4.5km main course and 3km cool down run.. promoted to group B but feel bad that ling er have to run with me at a much slower pace... i got to pull up my sock and train harder.. can't let coach down and of cos myself also... got to buy some longer socks to pull.. been wearing ankle sock.. scare will spoil my ankle socks...

rule number 1 for training: stuck in ur shirt
rule number 2 for training: do ur best for the training
rule number 3 for training: eat more half spring rice for dinner

things might be better this way... although i'm kind of sad but it's all my fault for not doing much...

25 September 1.38am

finally get the stuff already.. took me a few hour think of wat to write and how to pack it... damn it i lost my school ez-link card.. always like tat.. whenever i had a bad day some bad thing will happen... hai.. got to get a replacement.. time trial for today training.. screw up a little by running too fast on first 200m then the next 200m is like slow down a lot... well manage to meet timing.. AT LAST!!! think that my PB for 400m 69sec... i know compare to other it's might be the training standard but to me it's my PB.. wonder if i can be faster if i nv screw up my first 200m... just before i took the time trial.. i keep thinking how should my pace be... and how should i run... oh man... i'm just giving myself extra stress.. i want result for my time trial... did suicde after time trial... finally know wat that... and i don't wish to do that that often... as usual.. slack at the staduim till very late... somemore we went for dinner.. reach home around 11 plus.. and i start to haunt for my ez-link... Argh can't seem to find it... nvm got another more important stuff to do... left my notebook on without touching it... just too busy doing my important thingy...

time to move on.. whether is good new or bad news.. better to find out before i regret...

might be smiling, laughing toking crap but inside me it's just worried, stress and scare...

24 September 1.31am

my brain and heart is so heavy!!! even now!!! why did i lie!!!! if i nv maybe i'll be sleeping peacefully or maybe sadly.. i hate this kind of feeling!!! what should i do!!!

23 September

as usual went to work with a heavy mind... keep thinking about some stuff... can't even focus today... came stocks and it's a lot... well have to slowly pack it... didn't do much today not even sale cos my mind just can't focus... finally know the answer to clear my mind... me flirt? i don't know if i am... but i'm sure i not up to standard to flirt... only those good looking and well build guy then can flirt.. if i flirt think a lot of people will vomit... well some of them think that i did flirt which mean to say most of them had vomited more than once... at time i really don't understand myself at all... last time my friends say i must change, must talk to gals more and i did.. then they say i must treat then better and i change... but now.. think i overdo it... think i just go back to my old self... no more laming talk lesser... think this way will be the best for all... i rather have more friends like this then no friends if i keep behaving like this... which i don't know how i been behaving... Argh!!! is there any kind soul that can help me!!!

22 September

went out since morning... went to town to buy running pant at Nike since i need to use up the voucher... shop for the whole morning before heading back to school... met raymond to play CS then go clubhouse take jacket... haha at the clubhouse, we let amanda and kai yin to buy while we teach them.. so funny la the way they play.. keep screaming!!! wednesday will continue playing... did 3.2km for training and 10 x 100m striding... training was ok... went for dinner after that then head back home....

something is wrong... wonder is it u or me? feel so weird..

ubin outing

damn tired... didn't sleep the whole night... morning damn stun lor... kai yin tell me the meeting timing wrongly... shit.. end up i have to rush down.. but nvm la... she feel bad also... had fun at ubin... cycle alot.. the place quite dangerous... after ubin we went for movie... not bad the show quite nice and funny too... argh i fall asleep during the show.. think i slept for a few min... sian... miss a bit of the show... after that went for dinner and head back home... too tired to blog so ya short one will do..

5.30am on 21 September

Argh!!! i can't sleep!!! haven't been sleeping yet.. think past my sleeping time already that why.. anyway got to head out to ubin soon... meeting them at 8am... found out sometime... my sister never bath when she came home!!! EEEE...... disgusting la!!!

20 September

went out with my sec friends after work today... request to leave a bit early.. had dinner at home then headed out to meet them... it's been a long while since we meet up together as a group.. hmm group of less than 8 people.. not gangster meeting.. talk alot about army thingy... as some of them just enlist... had super together and we head off to tiong bahru garden there to chat and show off the number of chin up we can do... well still 2nd.. my friend still can do a lot.. sian... spent a few hour there talking and finally decided to head back home... well bathed and while brushing my teeth.. heard someone opening the door.. my sister was unlocking the gate.. she don't have the key of the main door as i lock it when i reach back... i was thinking... i thought i'm late enough to reach bcak around 2 to 3am but she's worst... for me i only go back late once in a while and guess wat she did that every weekend.. sick! do all those unheathly stuff.. hate her when she start smoking at home!!! can't she like live a healthy life style... no wonder getting so fat... don't even bother to talk to her sometime..

why is my life so tought!!!

19 Setptember

didn't do much today... wake up then went to buy breakfast then slack the whole afternoon watching drama... went for training, training was easy... hopefully by Wednesday time trial will be able to go back to group 2... but kind of scare also.. scare can't catch up with the group 2.. guess i really have to strike hard... after training went to play sparkler.. we finish playing ti quite fast.. then we headed out for dinner..

18 Septemeber

working today... worked with a china gal.. as usual.. hush puppies hired a lot of china staffs... oh well... god bless is not that robot china gal if not my day will be DAMN boring.. reach work place early... miracle... i don't really go to work on time cos go early also not counted i mean my pay so i either reach on the dot or late a bit.. but i didn't late for any other thing de.. always early for school, training and meeting friends... work was ok with the china gal.. she only keep asking me to explain the e-mail and some document for work cos all in english... other then that noting really much.. just like chat abit here and there... sale was bad... shit man today comission very little only lor.. $3.30 only.. if go other outlets confirm can earn more de... sian... evening come stocks.. lucky not a lot can finish packing it fast.. today central mall there got some dance and stuff so at night when there isn't any customer, i will just stand at the edge of the shop and watched... time to knock off... yeah! so tired la.. worked from morning to night...

life is not about winning all the time, at time u will fall... the important thing is how u stand up and move forward with ur life... my life is damn screw up, but i still manage to find happiness in it...

result is out!!! happy that didn't fail but sad that GPA so low..

haven't been blogging for sometime.. today result is out... can't sleep well last nite.. too nervous and scare that i fail my maths... wake up at 8plus... but still have 1 hour plus more before the result is out.. actually yesterday can check le.. just that i forget the school e-mail password that why have to wait till morning then can check.. at 9.30am, get a sms from SAS to inform us about the grade.. heng.. never fail but didn't score very well... have to wait till 10am to check my GPA.. sian get 3.02 only lor... oh well at least nv fail...

was slacking at home the whole morning.. plan to take a nap in the afternoon but then my friend call me out for basketball.. ah yo.. my sleeping time gone! weather was so hot lor.. i try my best not to shag myself out... still got training after that... well we only play for around half an hour then head out for a drink then my friend come my house to look at his betta fishes.. those fishes is from him to me... haha so proud of myself when he say my fighting fishes look nice compare to his.. haha

time to go training... started a bit late today.. did 2.4km pacing run... during the run i just look forward for the last lap whereby it's time to pick up speed and run to the finishing line... oh well finally understand what coach was planning for us.. 2.10min per lap.. hm... quite OK pace... think i'll use that pace for my 21km run in dec... was hoping to run 5min per km for it... might be a bit hard but just have to train more for it... actually want to play sparkler after training de.. but Mei yi training end late so didn't play.. she's the one that suggested playing lantern and stuffs so ya have to wait for her also.. since everyone wanted to go so ya postpone till friday ba hopefully will be able to.. if not i have to play those 100 stick of sparkler myself.. haha


there's a limit to everything... don't wait for something impossible... although Adidas say noting is impossible

first outing with R²unners‏

So fun today! went to Sentosa and play volleyball, soccer and many more games... tiring but really fun.. the whole of us have been playing hard from playing volleyball to kicking sands and destroying my castle.. oh well really enjoy it.. went to dinner after that, not much stuff just eat talk then head off to play.. haha went to look at toys and stuff.. nowadays kid are wonderful.. so many high tec toy to play with... last stop of the day, we went to mac to enjoy ice-cream and amanda and ling er do a lot of funny thing la.. nerd kissing style. well too bad coach robin never join us... if he came, confirm will be more fun and ~cold~... below is some attach photo..

group photo wihtout pei yi

Grace with those small kid toy.. haven't grow up.. haha

Amanda n Grace love it! i mean the helments

this is wat i call nerd kssing style.. good try.. need to improve on it

14 September

didn't went for work today as i'm still not like 100% recover.. if go to work confirm damn shag de... in the evening, i decided to go for the cousin gathering.. had dinner there and we head off to swensen to eat ice-cream... service damn bad la.. we waited 40min for our ice-cream to be serve.. after that we head off to play lantern.. so long didn't play liao.. it's those candle type de.. lolz.. went back home after that... sentosa here i come!

12 September

not feeling well after i wake up... been running to and fro the toilet.. suffer from stomach cramp too!! argh!!! hate this feeling... this remind me of 2 year ago when my stomach cramp till people have to send me to other camp medical central for treatment... it's so painful... still head for training.. did a slow one but after running i found that i can't breath normally.. shit... still have to play game... sian.. lolz when playing the game got one SIM gal step on my hand.. lucky she nv fully step down if not confirm very pain de... after training we went for dinner.. came back home and ya.. still feel very unwell... if tomorrow still the same, guess i'll have to cancel my work.. no choice..

hate myself.. what make me think this way!!! hate to have an unanswer question in my mind...

11 September

working today... late for work as i can't wake up early till to yesterday entertainment... thought after work can come online and chat then head to sleep but my friend give me a call just now asking if i want to join them for night cycling.. oh well my two friends are in ns now so very hard to go out with them so ya i join them.. we met 2315hr at lau di fun... we totally don't know where to go.. the only thing i want is to settle dinner first as i haven't eat anything from 2pm.. so we head toward beach road direction and find food.. we settle our dinner eating curry fish head and some side dishes.. the food not very nice but wat to do... after that we just anyhow cycle around the place... we found ourself at little india after 10min of cycling... we head straight and reach boon keng.. lolz.. so far already.. i suggest we head back just in case we lost our way.. on the way back to kallang... GOT ROAD BLOCK!!! haha first time i go nite cycling got road block.. the policeman was quite stun to see us and so do us... we were like keep asking around what to do la.. then i just head to the officer and told him that we were just cycling around.. oh well guess that they're the first time blocking bicycle ba.. after that we just cycle around the place till we really got to where to go and my friend need to return home also.. so we decided to call it a day and head back home.. reach home around 4am.. think i better post this and head to sleep...

10 September

today training was relax.. did lot of drills and ya a mini time trial.. i did 200m... after that we just sit around and talk... meeting derrick they all for company dinner well foods was quite nice and ya do enjoy it.. haha heard that our pay will increase! think tomorrow go confirm again before i go celebrate... after dinner, i share cab with derrick, chris and richard.. richard drop off early.. the rest of we three drop off the same place.. after coming out from cab i ask if they will to fo for second round (i was just kidding), they just say ok let go for coffee.. my god lolz.. oh well once in a while nvm ba.. since 3 of us working tomorrow too just that i work at tamp hai.. tok about some stuff and ya finally go back home.. i reach home around 2am plus bath and ya time to sleep..

9 Septemeber

working today.. reached work place early but went to have breakfast before heading to work.. thought working with the china mei but nope is working with the in-charge.. no bad either got to earn more commission and ya i know the in-charge for very long liao.. today i'm doing opening and closing so ya haha i'm the in-charge today.. haha no la.. i'm just a part timer.. stocks came early in the morning so my morning is like damn busy la.. somemore my in-charge heading out to buy some shop stuff lucky he go to the bank on the way to buy those stuff if not i will have to walk all the way out to the bank.. well quite boring cos no customer... tomorrow company treating dinner yeah! but it's damn late la.. saw the way my in-charge push for sale, damn li hai la.. customer wanted to buy one pair of shoe only but end up bought 2 pair AND the customer will be back for another one! my god! must learn from him.. haha time to brush up my skills just like last time.. haha i also know how to push sales de ok.. haha

dragging and dragging..

8 September

wake up early then went to buy food.. didn't do much on my holiday.. work, training and slacking at home.. today training was 800m x 2 and 400m x 2 but only did first 3 set as coach ask me to stop due to my wrong running style is wrong.. oh no.. big trouble!!! have to brush up on that.. tried bringing up my knee when running and feel damn tiring la.. only 4oom leh.. not my own self.. did drill after the run.. didn't went out dinner with kai yin they all... went to buy dinner then head back home to enjoy it... as usual online after that..

7 September

well went to work at imm.. was late for 2min cos i went to buy breakfast oh well.. i don't really care.. this company sux... today worked with the in-charge and one part timer.. din't knew her well so didn't tok to her much.. or rather nv tok more than 10 words i guess.. well i'm not those type that will start toking first.. bad thing i know.. work was ok untill one super ma fun uncle came in.. was around 3pm.. and that my lunch time... he damn ma fun la.. chose this and that.. somemore all sale items.. hai.. actually not hungry de.. but serve him till i very hungry lor.. lucky he got buy if not really waste my time.. after lunch feel so sleepy then i don't really bother about comission.. i just serve the customer that want to buy then those just look only.. well haha finally can go home.. didn't wait for them to go together.. i went off myself.. same thing reach home, online then head off to bath and here i am blogging..

6 September

today morning need to go pray my grandpa so got to wake up early.. well not really early too... everyone wake up just nice to move out expect my older sis... already tell her we got to go pray then she still go back home so early in the morning and chose not to attend.. Argh! we only pray once per year and she didn't even bother at all!

we didn't manage to find the temple by taking bus so we end up taking cab in.. lucky not very ex cos the place quite near to the place we stop at... really respect my aunt they all.. they like offer the prayer so fast la.. we go there for a while then head off to my grandma place for lunch... had a light lunch then off we go.. time to go home..

went to suntec for a while.. went to get some stuff for myself and my pet rabbit.. wa.. my rabbit stuff is double the price of mine lor.. sian overspent again... since i overpsent i decided not to go out tonight so i went to find cai to help keep his fighting fishes.. and since we got noting to do, we went for basketball game.. it's been a long long time since i play a match.. lucky still can score.. just that not up to standard only.. shit injure my toe.. the skin came off.. hai basketball shoe too small liao..

wanted to get half spring chicken for dinner.. but it's seen that everyone crave for half spring today.. have to wait for 40min to get it.. so instead of eating that i chose something that can serve me fast.. it's started raining when i'm on my way back home la.. well i enjoy my dinner while watching movie..

sian!!! tomorrow got work...

should i?

5 Septemeber

today training is just 6 x 200m.. quite a easy run... after that we play a game then everyone have to do 100m low hurdles just that some do more some do less only quite fun doing the hurdles but tiring also lor.. so usual we go for dinner after training then we like tok very long at the dinning place.. reach home around 11 plus oh well.. think i really have a fun with track friends..

2 month liao haha.. oh well can't believe i disturb for so long..

4 Septemeber

when i board the bus to work, i found out that i forgot to bring my working shoe.. my god.. had to U turn go back home and take.. when i look at the time i know that i will be late so i take my time t go back.. went to buy coffee first then head back home.. when i reached work place.. i'm only 9min late.. found out that i'm working with some one i didn't know.. oh no... scare work with another robot.. but ok la she quite ok and well better looking than other china mei... but one thing bad about her.. she mess up the counter!!! so messy lor.. wa.. and when she call me, she's like pull my shirt la lolz... oh well still not that bad i guess.. rather than working with robot.. starting didn't really talk to her much.. but after lunch time think ok liao ba.. haha cos she need my help to read e-mail... all english de. so some don't understand.. oh well time to head back home and rest.. planning to watch those movie my cousin lent.. so ya.. late night for me!

4 September morning

it's 8.37am now.. and i just reach home half an hur ago! went to cousin place after training yesterday to help her format her computer... but spent 3 hour plus backing up files... sian... oh well no choice she need to use her computer so urgently... yesterday training was fun.. although it's tiring... haha... well better stop now.. still got some time for a nap before heading out to work..

2nd September

working today.. hai no people de... sale damn bad la.. wanted to eat lunch at 4pm plus but got one uncle come in disturb me.. keep asking me to take shoe for him to try la.. end out nv buy somemore.. waste my time... i ate my lunch at 5pm plus lor.. so hungry... when i see the time and thought it's about time to close shop, then i tell my in charge that i go take water to mop the floor. he told me today close at 10pm la.. extent half an hour.. sian la.. reached home around 11pm plus.. so late lor.. well tomorrow nv work so i plan to go buy some fishes stuff and maybe my rabbit stuff too... pet shopping tomorrow..

1 September

woke up around 11am today.. feel so lazy today.. lazy to go ta bao food also.. after i finally step out of house i found out that after lunch time then almost all the food is gone lor.. only left like a bit here and there.. so sian.. don't know wat to eat... hai ah ya anyhow eat la.. didn't do much after eating... just like stone in front of my laptop... time to go out for training.. took mrt back but the train is like damn pack la.. hardly can get out also... today training quite relax.. did 5 x 400m.. well my timing qutie ok.. all the timing like about the same.. we play game after running.. haha quite fun.. didn't go out with the rest for dinner as i want to eat some home cook stuff.. if not the next few day will be ta boa liao..

last post of the months.. 31 August

working today after so long.. didn't worked for about 2 to 3 weeks liao... i reached the shop just on time and found out that i'm working with the in-charge.. he behave and look like an ah beng lor.. haha but ok la.. very nice to talk to.. sian the shop and the store is at different level so if the stock happen to be on the store upstair, then we have to go up to take the stocks and of cos if customer never buy then have to put it back.. argh.. somemore today have to stay for extra 1 hour plus.. need change all the shoe price tag.. sian lor we have lesser man power lor.. only got 2 of us but have to change so many price tag... i left my work place at 11pm plus.. sian haven;t eat then didn't draw money.. i had to find atm before getting my dinner lor.. sian... went online and ya.. wait for food to digest b4 turning in to bed...

i wonder.. r u thinking of wat i thinking?